


I met him on Tinder [s.m]

by crushingly



Category: Shawn Mendes (Musician)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 14:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 11,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19152487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crushingly/pseuds/crushingly
Summary: i met him on Tinder and guess how long it took for the whole thing to fall apart?all rights reserved





	1. just a note

**Author's Note:**

> ok hello intellectuals of ao3 I have imported this fanfic from my wattpad in the hopes that I will have a different reading audience here :) please let me know what you think in the comments! wattpad version started october 2018. unfinished.

hey guys !! im so hyped for this ff omg !! there will be some extra stuff later, including the cast and playlist for this ff !! you can find the playlist at my spotify user cadence cxw .

so let's get started

started: october 2018 on wattpad  
ended: ?                                                                                                                           


	2. cast

A/N: I DONT SHIP BILLIE WITH SHAWN OKAY IT'S JUST FOR THE SAKE OF THIS FF also, i will be updating this page whenever new characters come out :)

Shawn Mendes as Himself

Billie Eilish as Mary Hudson

Camila Cabello as Herself

Lana Del Rey as Sara Jacobs (Mary's mum)

Reece Bibby as Jake Limmons 

Rest of the characters as Themselves

 

 

 

 

 


	3. playlist

okay so rn I don't have any songs to put in this but if I do I will update this page so just stay tuned and I will notify you if I do add songs :)

 _thinking about -_ lauren aquilina

 _yellow -_ cenji

 _ghostin -_ ariana grande

 

 

 

 


	4. I need to forget

Started: 17 Oct 18

Completed:

Shawn's POV

I scan the surroundings for Mary, my date. I am terribly late.

I spot Mary in a matter of seconds. It isn't hard to find her, considering the fact that she is dressed in yellow and has an extremely pronounced scar on her left cheek.

I don't think she saw me, since she's still looking at her phone.

I walk over to her."Uh, hey! I'm Shawn Mendes," I say, stretching out my hand to Mary.

"Mary Hudson. You're fashionably late, huh?" she says with a tone of sarcasm, shaking my hand.

Oops. I forgot to apologise. I smile awkwardly. "Sorry," I say.

"First things first, if you just want sex, get the hell out of here," she says, pointing to the exit of the restaurant.

I am taken aback. How sudden.

"Oh, no, no. There have been...incidences?" I say, searching for the right word. This is starting to get really awkward.

"Some jerks get handsy on our first meeting," she says rolling her eyes. "I hope you're not one of them," her ocean eyes pierce right into my soul.

I shudder involuntarily. "No, no" I smile, which probably made me look weird.

"Okay," Mary says, sipping her tea. I dig in my bag for the list of questions I'm supposed to ask her. I take the pieces of paper out.

"What's this?" Mary asks, putting down her cup of tea. "A list of 20 questions to ask on your first date," I say stiffly. Hopefully Mary will help me forget about Camila.

"Eh, okay. Extremely scripted," Mary says, wrinkling her nose. "Let's just get started," I say, though I am hesitant. This is gonna be really awkward.

"First question. Describe yourself in one word," I read from the list.

"Cynic. Me in one word," Mary says and sips her tea nonchalantly. "Troubled. Me in one word," I say uncomfortably.

"Well. We both have our problems," Mary finally looks up at me.

After a few seconds, I break the eye contact with her. She suddenly laughs loudly, causing everyone in the restaurant to stare at her.

Then she abruptly stops and smiles at me. "Sorry. It's just funny how I make everyone I meet uncomfortable just 'cause I'm weird. People like to judge by looks. Just 'cause you're good looking doesn't mean you want to be treated like a sex object," Mary says, looking around. I nod. A wave of memories come crashing upon me. Shit.

"Hey, sexy! How's your summer? We could do some stuff tonight!" Tiffany Jacobs, groping my ass.

"Babe, I've missed you. Let's have some pleasure," Riya Raymond, her hands on my body.

"Hey, boy. Let's turn down the lights and have a good time. Skin against skin," Rosanne Perkins, a bitch through and through.

My relationship with Camila was the only non-abusive one. The only time when I wasn't treated like a sex object. Oh shit. I miss her.

A/N: OKAY that's all I hoped you guys liked this one !! hopefully this chapter blew your mind (mwah) _if you knew what song that was I LOVE YOU_

see yall!!

 


	5. she walked out on him

_billie and shawn slay it'll be awesome if they could collab omg_

Mary's POV

"Ay. Ay. What the heck?" I wave my hand in front of Shawn, who's eyes were glazed over.

"Sorry," he snaps out of his daze.

"What were you even thinking about?" I ask, trying not to sound curious. But I am genuinely curious.

"You don't have to know," he replies rudely.

"Damn," I say. Something must have really triggered him.

"Okay. Second question. Why did you get Tinder?" Shawn changes the subject abruptly.

"You?" I ask, wanting him to answer first.

"I needed to forget," he says, again very vaguely.

"Well, okay, so... you don't want to make a commitment?" I have already guessed that Shawn probably wants to forget his ex. He just wants a rebound girl. I don't care, anyway. I never really liked to commit myself too.

Shawn starts fiddling with his thumbs. "I don't know," he says. 

I'm starting to get annoyed with this guy. Like, seriously? Three word replies, at the most five words.

"Okay, I got Tinder 'cause I needed to, like, okay, I need to get a boyfriend. 'Cause my life isn't going anywhere and I'm 23. I need to find a life purpose," I will myself not to lose my patience with Shawn. I won't get anywhere disappointing date after date.

Shawn stares at me with his brown eyes. Then he starts laughing. "My dear, finding a boyfriend isn't how you get purpose in life."

I'm pissed. Especially since he used a demeaning tone to say "my dear".

I scoff. "Who are you to judge?" I have obviously gotten into his bad books. Never mind. 

"I'm no one," he says quietly.

"Okay. I'm leaving. Bye, asshole," I grab my bag and stand up to leave.

"Wait. Your number?" 

What?! Did he just ask for my number after such a bad start?

I roll my eyes and take out a marker from my pocket. I scribble my number on his hand. 

"Okay, bye for real," I walk out on him. Ha. That'll teach him to act like a real gentleman.

_ok guys thats all becos this chapter was really short im gonna post another one shortly. hope you enjoyed this short outburst! also i think mary was too critical...  what do yall think? see you guys soon !! <3 <3_

 


	6. unknown numbers

One hour later

Mary's POV

My phone buzzes.

_iMessage:_

_Unknown number - hey it's Shawn :)_

Well that's fast.

_To: Unknown number - hi asshole. i'm afraid you have reached the phone of mary hudson._

_Unknown number - i'm really sorry about just now..._

_To: Unknown number - ok. i'm not sorry._

_Unknown number - no, it's alright_

_To: Unknown number - sure._

_Unknown number - is there some way i could make it up to you?_

_To: Unknown number - no. i'm sorry to disappoint you._

_Unknown number - ok. friends?_

_To: Unknown number - i would prefer to stay as acquaintances._

_Unknown number - alright_

(i feel so bad for shawn, gosh...)

I suddenly feel so sorry for treating Shawn this way. He's not that bad, really. 

I save his contact into my phone.

_First name: shawn_

_Last name: asshole_

_Company: assholes_

(AHAHAHHHHH MARY YOU BITCHHHH)

My phone buzzes again.

_Unknown number - hey babe_

Jake. I hate him.

_To: Unknown number - please stop pestering me. i dont love you anymore._

_Unknown number - aw mary dont do this. im jake_

_To: Unknown number - yes i know you're jake. please f off._

_Unknown number - you were the one who started this. you were the one who held me hostage_

_To: Unknown number - yes i know that. i thought that we had promised to leave each other alone._

_Unknown number - you were the one who said that. i didnt promise to anything_

_To: Unknown number - jake. please. leave me alone. let me live my life._

_Unknown number - but i am part of your life_

_To: Unknown number - im moving on._

_Unknown number - with who_

_To: Unknown number - his name's shawn and he's a wonderful guy. not like you._

_Unknown number - that hurts_

_To: Unknown number - that's what i was going for._

_Unknown number - what's his number_

_To: Unknown number - you seriously think that i'm gonna give it to you?_

_Unknown number - i was trying my luck_

_To: Unknown number - okay. now leave me alone. i dont have time for this little chat with you._

_Unknown number - you know i'll find you again._

Just great. I can't let him find me. I'm not gonna let a psychopath into my life again. Even though I am one.

_a/n: omg guys. this was... this is my fave chapter so far!! i hope you guys love it as much as i do :))) <3<3<3 p.s. this jake guy freaks me out._

 

 

 

 

 


	7. a proper date

Mary's POV

_a week later_

_from: jake the real asshole - hey babe im just gonna drop by your house for a sec_

_from: jake the real asshole - i wanna run my hands through your hair again_

_from: jake the real asshole - lets not make things difficult okay_

_to: jake the real asshole - f off._

_to: jake the real asshole - find some other girl to torture._

_to: jake the real asshole - i dont want you in my life anymore._

_to: jake the real asshole - i wont make things difficult for you if you dont._

_from: jake the real asshole - i know you still would_

_to: jake the real asshole - please._

_to: jake the real asshole - i beg you._

_to: jake the real asshole - dont ruin my life._

_from: jake the real asshole - oh sure i'll fuck it up_

_from: jake the real asshole - lol i miss you_

Jake again. I had thought he would keep a distance. Apparently I was wrong.

_from: shawn asshole - hey! :)_

_to: shawn asshole - hey there._

_from: shawn asshole - are you still mad at me? im really sorry..._

_to: shawn asshole - no shit, shawn, you really think im still mad?_

_from: shawn asshole - i do hope not_

_to: shawn asshole - i dont think i still can be mad at you haha._

_from: shawn asshole - im relieved :)_

_to: shawn asshole - im not that petty okay._

_from: shawn asshole - well you sure seemed petty at the date_

_to: shawn asshole - i sure was a little pissed._

_from: shawn asshole - well okay. wanna go for a date tonight? a proper one?_

Well, maybe. I need some refuge from Jake.

_to: shawn asshole - sure!! where?_

_from: shawn asshole - the park near the restaurant. its really beautiful there_

_to: shawn asshole - okay!! when?_

_from: shawn asshole - in 2 hours?_

_to: shawn asshole - sure :)_

_from: shawn asshole - see you!_

Okay that's settled. I just need to keep Jake off my trail for a while.

I check the time. 5p.m. I should be able to get ready by 6.45 and then meet Shawn at the park.

I take a bath to pamper myself. It's been ages since I got into the bathtub and relaxed.

I close my eyes. The last time I was in a bathtub, I almost got drowned by Jake.

_"Jake! Babe! Please! You love me, right?" I said, grabbing frantically onto Jake's arms._

_"Bitch, you really think I loved you? You cheated on me with that jerk!" Jake said and pushed me down into the water._

_"Jake! I've told you so many times! I wasn't kissing Caleb! That was another girl! Not me! Stop with this shit!" I somehow managed to fight Jake's power and get my head above the water._

_"The only way to stop with this shit is to kill you!" Jake said and continued pushing me down._

_I flail my arms around wildly._

_"No!" another voice. Jake looked up and released his grip on me a little. I took the advantage to escape the bathtub, but Jake was too quick for me. He immediately grabbed me and punched me, then covered my mouth and flung me against the bathroom wall._

_"Stop! Stop!" the other voice said. He entered the bathroom and punched Jake. The only thing I remember before I passed out was that the guy that saved me had a tattoo of a bird on his hand._

I open my eyes. I suddenly recall the fact that Shawn has a tattoo of a bird on his hand. No way. No way. I just agreed to go on a date with the guy that practically saved my life. No shit.

I feel that Shawn's voice sounded like the guy. Or maybe I'm over-imagining. But it's true that Shawn and the guy share the same tattoo. 

_***********************************************************************************************_

_7p.m._

"Hey Mary!" Shawn waves his hands in the air and I spot him from a distance. I wave back. Hopefully I will find out soon whether Shawn is the one who saved me. 

I walk briskly towards Shawn's silhouette. I reach him in a matter of seconds.

As soon as I reached him I grab his hands. There it is. A bird tattoo on his right hand.

I examine him from top to toe. I tip-toe to touch his hair. I vaguely remember the colour of the guy's hair. Brown, I think. Just like Shawn's.

"No way," I mutter.

"Yes? Why are you suddenly fascinated with me?" Shawn laughs.

"Are you the guy who saved me 2 years ago from my abusive boyfriend who was trying to drown me alive?" I blurt out.

Shawn takes a step back. "It was you?" he says slowly, obviously surprised.

I nod. One of the greatest mysteries of my life has finally been solved.

"No way! I'm so glad you're alive!" Shawn says and hugs me excitedly.

"I'm just a random stranger. Besides, did you really think I would die?" I say into the hug.

"Who knows what would happen with that jerk? Also, you're not just a random stranger. Every person is important and unique," Shawn says, hugging me tighter.

I laugh. "Preach," I say sarcastically.

We must look like a strange sight, a really tall boy and a midget girl hugging. My head is literally on Shawn's chest.

I break away from the hug. 

"So how's that jerk doing? I'm really relieved that you broke up with him," Shawn says incorrectly.

"Well, yes, we have broken up, but I wasn't able to tie up the loose strings. You can guess how I got this scar," I say, pointing to my face.

"Oh. I didn't see that when I rescued you. He probably cut you?" Shawn tries to say as politely as possible.

"Yes. A few weeks after our breakup," I say, looking at the floor.

"He found you?" Shawn says.

"Well, yes, even after I changed my number and blocked him and relocated to another part of town."

"Oh. Is he still harassing you?" Shawn asks, concerned.

I show him the text conversation with Jake.

"Do you need me to stay with you? So that Jake can't disturb you?" Shawn asks, not thinking through.

I laugh. "Shawn, we barely know each other. I'm not gonna let a guy stay with me overnight."

Shawn's face falls. "You're scared that I'll be the next Jake? Come on, I saved your life, do you really think I'll treat you the same way he treated you? Promise I will treat you better."

"No, it's not about that," I say, though I am afraid of him deep down. I can't allow myself to make the same mistake. "It's just that... it's awkward, you know?" 

"Sure, I know," he laughs and runs his hand through his hair. "You're pretty cute, you know?"

I choke. No, this bitch ain't cute. I pose a "cute" action sarcastically.

Shawn smiles. "So, I can't stay with you?"

"Well, you can drop by occasionally, but no, you can't stay overnight," I say apologetically.

"Oh, okay. No worries," he smiles, but I could tell he is disappointed.

"Where are we going for dinner? I'm kinda hungry," I say, trying to change the subject.

"Oh! Right! I booked a table for 2 at the fine dining restaurant," Shawn smiles and takes my hand. Wow. Fine dining. "It must be really expensive," I say. "No, it's quite alright," Shawn says gentlemanly. We stroll towards the restaurant.

I smile and look up at Shawn. It feels like it's been forever since I felt this happy. 

After we were seated, Shawn starts the conversation. "So, what do you like to eat?" I think about it. "Most food," I say finally. I like to eat too much stuff. "Good, you should like the dinner then," Shawn says. After a few minutes of talking about food, hobbies and music, I learnt that Shawn likes to play the guitar, and that he has written a few songs. "Cool! Play me some songs next time!" I say, interested. "Of course! Though I usually save the guitar for later," he says shyly.

I laugh. "Don't be so shy, Shawn."

***********************************************************************************************

_After dinner and a stroll_

"See you next time, Mary! It was a lovely night with you!"Shawn says when we have arrived at my doorstep.

"It was beautiful. Thank you, Shawn," I smile.

He gives me a kiss on my cheek. "Good night, beautiful," Shawn whispers.

"Good night," I whisper. I wave at him as he walks off. Shawn was lovely just now, I can't help but think.

I unlock the door and walk into my apartment. There was a note on my couch.

_Hey Mary,_

_I just saw you and your boyfriend in the park. You're abandoning me for him so fast. Don't forget that he'll be beat up very soon if you don't let me into your life again. See you tomorrow._

_xx Jake_

_WOW THAT WAS A REAL CHAPTER!! I HOPE YOU GUYS LOVE IT AS MUCH AS I DO!! I'LL PROB POST AGAIN NEXT WEEK!! till next time lovelies!! <3<3<3 also btw mary was not in the same bathtub she almost got drowned in. she moved and somehow jake found her again. okay thanks:)_

 


	8. jake.

_A/N: HEY. IM SO EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER. I HOPE YOU WILL LIKE IT TOO. AND ALSO SORRY FOR STARTING THIS CHAPTER WITH CUSSING LOL._

Mary's POV

"Shit," I mutter under my breath. Jake's serious. Just when I was starting to get my life back together, he comes back and fucks it up. I play with the thought of calling Shawn for help. No. I can't let him get involved. I barely know him.

I close my eyes as I recall the last time I was with Jake. 

_6 months ago_

_I open the door. Jake's standing there in the doorway, hands in his pocket and looking guilty. "Jake? What the hell are you doing here? I still remember what happened. I can't forgive you, okay. I can't. Please leave if you want to get back with me. 'Cause that ain't happening," I say, almost slamming the door on him. "Wait!" he grabs the door and pushes it open again. "I'm sorry," he says, hugging me tightly. My arms hang limp by my sides, not knowing what to do._

_"I made a mistake. I was wrong. I went to see a therapist. I'm better now. Please let me back into your life, Mary. You're all I ever wanted. I need you babe," Jake says, caressing my hair. "No, no, I can't," I say, pushing him away. "Why?" a desperate plea from him. Tears gathering in his eyes. He forcefully closes the gap between us and kisses me. My eyes are wide open in surprise. He slowly runs his fingers through my hair. "Baby, I love you. Why don't you love me back?" Jake whispers into the kiss. By now his hands are on my waist, forcing me to give up. I close my eyes and hug him back._

_I thought I loved him. I give myself up to him. His lips find their way to my neck. He kisses it forcefully, leaving purple and blue flowers blossoming there in the morning. He slowly moves his hands below my t shirt, rubbing my back gently. I suddenly remember how I almost drowned because of him and I removed his hands from my back. "No, Jake, we can't do this," I whisper as I let go of him, tears in my eyes. "Why not, baby?" Jake says, still in that honeyed voice. "I thought I still love you, but I don't,"  I say weakly, afraid of what would happen if I don't want to agree to his desires. "Why can't you act like you love me, then?" his voice turning to a low growl. I retreat subconsciously to the corner of the room. "Why can't you, Mary? I love you with my whole heart, and this is how you treat me?" he growls. "Don't," I try to move back, but I feel the wall behind me. I'm trapped. "Give me what I want, then I won't hurt you. You know what I want, my dear," Jake says threateningly. He moves toward me slowly. I scan the room, looking for a way to escape. He'll have me any way. "No, Jake. No," I say, resolute. "Beat me up however way you want, but I won't let you have me." "Well fuck you," he says in a soft voice and punches my face. He begins pressing my throat, trying to strangle me. "You... won't... dare..." I manage to whisper. Jake lets go of my neck, much to my relief. "Right. I don't want to kill you. I just want to torture you," he smiles._

I open my eyes, tears brimming within them. I drop the note and collapse onto the floor, in a crying mess. I find my phone in my pocket. I unlock it and find Shawn's contact. I impulsively press "call". "Hey, Mary, what's up?" he says in a cheerful voice. I could almost hear him smiling. "Hey, Shawn," I say in a teary voice. "What happened? Why are you crying?" Shawn asks, hearing my sobs. I am silent. I can't drag Shawn into this mess. "Anxiety," I say, making something up. "Oh, I can come over now, you know? I'm still nearby," Shawn says immediately. I struggle with my need for comfort. I need to protect him, but I need the little comfort that he can offer. "Yes, please do," I whisper as I end the call. I am overcome by a crying fit as I realise how selfish that was.

I grab the note and hide it in my pocket. I can't let Shawn see it. 

***********************************************************************************************

The doorbell rings. "Mary?" Shawn's voice. I almost smile. I open the door. He's standing there with a concerned look on his face. I hug him immediately as I burst into sobs. I realise what I have done. He pats me on the back comfortingly. "You'll be alright," Shawn says. Right. He still thinks I have an anxiety attack. I cry even more. He lets me go and leads me to the couch. I rest my head upon his shoulder and cry into it. We sit there for a few moments before Shawn says something. "Okay, Mary, are you ready to tell me what happened?" Shit. I didn't spin a tale for this. I shake my head. "Okay, it's alright. Would you like to drink something?" Shawn says, standing up. "Wine," I say. I need some alcohol. He looks at me weirdly. "Okay, I'll go get it for you," he finally says and goes into the kitchen. _(LMAO shes definitely not playing the part of having anxiety)_

Shawn comes back with a bottle of red wine and two wine glasses. He pours it for both of us. I reach toward the coffee table for a glass. I slowly sip it. I immediately feel better. I smile at him and lean against his shoulder. "I'm starting to suspect that you called me over 'cause you wanted a drinking buddy," Shawn says, chuckling. I smile. "Maybe. Alcohol always makes me feel better," I say. "Don't drink too much," he says, becoming dad. I gulp down the whole glass and laugh. "Okay, daddy," I say, the alcohol getting into me. "Didn't think you're into that type of thing," Shawn says, laughing. "Maybe I am," I say. "Drink more," I say and gesture towards Shawn's glass, still rather full. "Okay, okay," he obliges and sips from his glass. "I'll have more," I say and pour another glass for myself. 

After finishing another glass, Shawn asks, "So what exactly did you call me over for?" I shrug. Due to the alcohol, I have forgotten what shit I got myself into. I pour myself a third glass. Or was it a second one? _(oh lol mary getting drunk is my shit AHAH)_ "Hey don't drink too much," Shawn warns. Or was it Sean? "Okay, boy," I laugh and ruffle his hair. I finish the glass within minutes. "Okay that's your last one," the boy says and takes my glass away from me. "Hey!" I shout and reach for the glass. "No you're drunk," he replies. "Ugh, I'm nooooot," I say. "Look, even your speech is slurred. It's time for you to sleep," he says. "Aw, no, it's too early, babe. The night's still young!" I say, laughing. The boy frowns. "What do you want to do, then?" he asks and sets the wine glasses on the table. "Piggyback me! Or I will beat you up!" I laugh. The boy sighs. "Okay," he obliges. "Yay! Thanks, love!" I say, staggering to my feet. "Careful," the boy mumbles. "Yes, daddy," I laugh and climb onto his back. Damn, he's tall. "Carry me around," I laugh and pinch his cute cheeks. "Okay, princess," the boy says and does so. "I love you," I shout, dragging the last word. "Do you love me?" I ask the cutie. "Yes, yes, yes," he sighs. "Aw, cutie," I say and pinch his cheeks again. "Can I let you down now?" he groans. "Yes, daddy," I laugh and ruffle his cute hair. "God," he mutters. He starts to let me down. I lie down on the floor and look up at him. His lips look do kissable. I get up and throw myself onto him. "What are you doing?" he asks. "Kiss me," I say. "Nope," he frowns. "Kiss me," I whine. He shakes his head. "Kiss. Me. Baby," I say and put my lips against his. I wrap my arms around him. He wraps his arms around my waist. After a while, he breaks away. "Aw, you're a good kisser," I laugh. "I love you," I say. "I love you too, babygirl," he laughs and pinches my nose. I laugh too. "You know, it's time to sleep. It's late and you're drunk," he says. "Okay," I say and stagger to the couch. He sits down and pats his lap, indicating for me to rest my head on his lap. "Good night, love," I say and close my eyes. He caresses my hair. "Good night, babygirl," I hear him say. 

_***********************************************************************************************_

Shawn's POV

"Help me, someone," Mary mumbles. "Please, Jake, no!" I open my eyes. Mary tossing and turning and shouting in her sleep is not helping me sleep well. "Ah!" she shouts and sits up abruptly. I realise her body is covered in cold sweat. "Hey, it's just a dream," I tap her shoulder. She mumbles something and goes back to sleep. I also go back to sleep.

***********************************************************************************************

Light streams in from the windows. I slowly open my eyes. I blink a few times to adjust my eyes to the sudden brightness. I rub my forehead. Headache. I smile as I recall what happened last night. Mary getting drunk and being ridiculous. I look down. She's still sleeping, head on my lap. She's smiling in her sleep. I chuckle and get back to sleep.

***********************************************************************************************

"Hey, Shawn, there's someone at the door," Mary wakes me up, pulling my shirt sleeves. "Oh, okay," I say and get up from the couch. Someone was knocking repeatedly. I open the door. A man slightly older than me was standing there. Jake. "Jake," I say, forcing on a smile. "Jake?" Mary screams from the couch. "Well, well, I assume you're Shawn?" he says, smiling.

_A/N: OH MY GOSH IM DONE WITH THIS CHAPTER YAY I GUESS. OKAY BYE GUYS SEE YALL NEXT WEEK LOVE YOU!!!_

 

 


	9. oh no you don't

Mary's POV

I rush to the door. "Shawn, I'll handle this. Go home," I say, putting a hand on his back. "Oh, no, I can't let you be alone with a dangerous person," Shawn says protectively. "Me, dangerous? Oh, you don't know," Jake laughs and enters the apartment, pushing past Shawn. "Looks like you guys fucked yourselves up last night," Jake says, looking at the wine glasses and the empty bottle of wine still on the coffee table. "Hmm, yeah. We had a good time, right, Mary?" Shawn wraps an arm around my waist. I shoot him a "what the heck are you doing" look. "Play along," Shawn mouths. "We sure did, babe," I tiptoe to kiss him on the cheek, making Jake jealous. I almost smirk at the look on his face.

Jake's eyes were filled with hatred and anger. "Fuck you!" he shouts and sends a punch flying towards Shawn's face. Shit. Shawn almost falls from the impact. He leans on me to steady himself. "Please get out now, before I do anything worse," Jake pushes Shawn towards the door. "Let me have some time alone with Mary." Jake wraps an arm around my waist tightly. "Go away!" I scream, struggling to escape his grasp. "Oh no you don't!" Shawn pushes Jake away and punches him, landing Jake on the floor. "That one's from Mary," he says and punches him again. "That one's from me," Shawn says. Then he kicks Jake in the arse. He whimpers. I gasp. "And that's from both of us. Now go away," Shawn grabs Jake's shirt collar and drags him towards the door. Jake grabs Shawn's hand and flings him to the wall. Jake punches him a few more times, until Shawn's almost unconscious. Then he kicks him in the stomach a few more times. I bring my hand to my mouth in shock. "You fuck off!" Jake shouts and drags me toward the room on the second floor. I try to escape, to no avail. 

I cringe when I think of what Jake would do to me alone. I look back at Shawn with a desperate look. "Get away from my girl!" Shawn barely manages to say. Jake ignores him and continues dragging me up the stairs. Finally, we reach the bedroom door. "Jake, don't," I try to say in a voice as threatening as possible. He ignores me and pushes the door open. He locks it shut and smiles. "I've got you," he says. He flings me onto the bed. I cry in horror at the look on Jake's face. He looks like he wants to eat me up.

Jake stares greedily at me and moves to the bed. I attempt to get up and escape through the open window, but he's too fast for me. He presses me down and gives me a punch on my face. I kick his stomach, but it's as if he's immune. He slaps me across the face. "Help! Someone! Fuck off, Jake!" I scream desperately for help. "Jake, I don't have anything to offer, please." "I can think of so many things you can offer. Especially one right now," the corners of his lips curl up. He caresses my scarred cheek. "You're beautiful, you know that," Jake says in his hypnotic voice. "I love you, and I would hate to give you another one," he says, referring to my scar. I fall into that honeyed voice, despite all the treachery it hinted at. "Come on, babe, stand up, don't just lie here," he says and grabs my waist. I try to resist, but I can't. My body follows his, and it conforms to the way he moves.

He's got me.

He moves to the corner of the room, and I can't help but follow, my hands on his chest. "Give me all of you," he whispers into my ear while trailing his fingers on the back of my neck. I shudder slightly. He gently begins to undo the first button on my blouse. Then the second. And the third. Within seconds, my blouse and pants were on the floor and Jake's hands on my bra straps. I could see a slight twinkle in his eyes. I look down at my bare body and close my eyes in fear of what will happen. Taking that as a signal, Jake's lips move closer to mine, barely brushing against mine. "God damn, you're a beauty," I feel Jake's hands on my hips, singeing into them.

I remember the things those hands did to me before. Yes, they were gentle on my cheeks, and on my body, but, no, those weren't the only things that they did. They tried to grasp my neck and suffocate me. They slapped me countless times. They almost drowned me. I open my eyes abruptly. I can't succumb to his touch, his scent, his presence. I push him away and grab my clothes from the floor. His brows furrow slightly in confusion, as if he couldn't understand why I'm leaving his touch. Then he seems to realise what I'm doing and grabs my hand. I look into his eyes. Anger, desire and hunger were clearly written in them.

"You know what I want," he says, hands moving to my shoulders. "I... I can't give you what you want. I'm leaving," I stutter and momentarily escape from his grasp. "No, you're not leaving," he says, his stare burning into me. I will never forget how he looked at me on our first date.This stare. It was this same stare that made me fall for him. And it was this same stare that made me leave him. The same stare that caused my downfall. And the same stare that freed me.

He doesn't need to have his arms around me. He doesn't have to touch me. I'm already in his grasp. He knows I won't leave. I can't.

He moves closer to me. My legs won't move, no matter how much I will them to.

His hands on my bare waist again, fingernails digging into them. I let out a soft groan. Suddenly something inside of him snaps, and he lets go of me. He slaps me on my face again. "The fuck?" I shout. He takes out a penknife from his pocket, the blade glistening like his eyes. He takes steps toward me and I move backward. But he's got me cornered. He draws the knife across my shoulder blade. I wince. Then he draws it across the exact same spot. I grimace. It isn't the first time he's done it to me. Not the second, either. I've lost count of how many times he's drawn this exact same penknife across my body. Then he digs the knife into the wound. I open my mouth in horror. He's never done this. He stabs it again. Tears drip down my cheek and onto the wound. "I hate you," I whisper in pain. Then he draws the knife across the same spot as my previous scar, opening it again. I collapse to the floor. He smiles, revealing his perfectly white teeth. Until now do I notice his ugly side. He lifts my chin and kisses my lips with as much force as he could, his teeth biting into my lips. He lets go of my chin and walks away. "I love you," he lies. Then he leaves through the window.

I bite my lip as hard as I could, drawing blood. Then I slap myself across the face, smearing blood across my cheek. I look at my hand and wonder how much blood is on Jake's hands. How many people's blood is on his hands. I slowly stand up and unlock the door, blood smearing on the doorknob. I push open the door and stumble out of the room. I grimace. Shawn's still lying there. He tries to push himself up but falls again and again. I had almost forgotten about him. "Shawn..." I whisper. I try to make my way down the stairs, but the pain in my shoulder was too much for me. I fall down halfway.

"Mary," Shawn groans and finally gets up, clutching his stomach. He makes his way toward me and climbs up the stairs. He bites his lip, seeing the state I was in. He rushes toward me and engulfs me in a gentle hug. "Don't worry, you'll be alright. You'll be alright," he says, rubbing my bare back. I let my tears fall freely onto his shirt. "It fucking hurts," I say. "You'll be alright, dear. You'll be alright," Shawn says and carries me down the stairs, grimacing a few times. He finally gets down the stairs and carries me over to the sofa. He puts me down gently, grimacing. Then he looks at my wound. "Fuck," he mumbles. "Can you help?" I ask desperately. "Yes," he says, though he doesn't sound so confident. "Please rest while I dress your wound." I close my eyes and fall into a fitful sleep.

***********************************************************************************************

Mary's POV

I open my eyes slowly and see Shawn lying on the floor. My shoulder was bandaged and there was a plaster on my face. There were also some pillows supporting my head and a blanket over my body. "Hey," I say softly. Shawn stirs. "Oh my God, Mary, you're awake! I was so worried," Shawn smiles and envelopes me in a hug. I whimper. "Oh, right, I'm so sorry," he says and lets go of me. I look at Shawn. "Oh, God, I'm so sorry that I got you into this mess," I say as I remember the incident. "No worries. I should be sorry, I'm the one that didn't protect you," Shawn says apologetically. I try to sit up, much to the pain at my stab wound. "I'll help you," Shawn adjusts my pillows and lifts me up gently. I smile. "Thanks," I say gratefully. "What did Jake do to you? I mean you're practically..." Shawn couldn't bring himself to say the last word. "He almost did something. But then something inside him snapped and he started stabbing me," I whisper as I start crying. "Jake ruined me. He fucked me up so badly. I'm a fucking mess. I hate myself for even being with him in the first place. I hate that he managed to get me naked and fuck me. So. Many. Times. I misjudged him. I only noticed his good side. Those blonde hair, those white teeth, that so called beautiful smile. I was living for his beauty. He was everything to me. But then something happened and he started beating me up. He started cutting me using that penknife. He started calling me slut, bitch, fucking worthless. But I still loved him. And I still do. I was scared. I was so scared and I didn't leave him in time. I believed that he would change. There's still a little part of me that still believes so. I hate him. I hate him," I start slapping myself for all the shit that I did. Shawn grabs my hands.

"Mary. Mary, look at me." I force myself to look up at him. "You are not worthless. You do not deserve to be treated like that. And you shouldn't hate yourself. It's not your fault. It's his. Don't blame yourself. He's the one that coaxed you into this mess. He's the cause of all this. Not you. You are beautiful, you are lovely, and you are worth everything," he says, totally unlike the way Jake said the same words. "Thank you," I say and clutch his hands. He smiles and leans closer to me. "I think I've fallen for you," he mutters and runs his fingers through his hair. "I felt something special last night. Mary, I think I like you," Shawn confesses. "No, what?" "I feel something when I'm with you. Like, I really want to be with you," he says. I could tell that he's sincere. But. "Shawn, I like you too. You're really nice and everything I could ask for. I'm not ready. Not yet. But you're a really great friend and a real gentleman. I really like you," I blurt out everything on my mind. I don't want to enter a relationship so fast, but I do feel something for Shawn. 

"No worries," Shawn says, obviously looking hurt. "Sorry," I mumble, feeling bad. He brightens up, like he thought of something. "Beer? I saw some cans last night. It can help you feel better," he suggests. I smile. "Yes, please. I'll just go dress myself."

A/N: aw shawn's so sweet :))) also,

reece bibby (new hope club) as jake limmons

 


	10. netflix and chiLL

Mary's POV

"Let's try not to get too drunk tonight," I say, laughing as I come down from my bedroom. Much to my relief, Shawn had cleaned the bloodstains on the floor in my room. I hear Shawn chuckle. "Did you even know what you did the last time?" Oh. Oh. OH. Just great. I probably embarrassed myself big time. "I do not want to know," I say, emphasizing the "not" as I flop onto the sofa. "Yup, you don't want to know," Shawn replies, turning on the TV.

"Is there a possibility of Trump being indicted?" the CNN news anchor asks in an interview. I snort. Yes, it's very likely and I can't wait for it. _(yes im a democrat LMAOOOO)_ "What do you think?" I ask Shawn. "No comments," he says, opening a can of beer and offering it to me. I take it gladly. "Ugh, people who sit on the fence." He smiles and opens a can himself. "Netflix?" he opens the Netflix app on the TV. "Oh, fine. CNN is quite amusing, you know. So biased in their reporting and I love it," I say. All thanks to Arick who got me interested in politics. "You're weird," Shawn passes me the remote. "Huh, what's new?" I reply. I browse through the different shows. Stranger Things? Watched. Riverdale? Watched. RuPaul? Not interested. And then I see a new show. "The Haunting of Hill House?" I grin. _(no, kids do **not** watch this. i didnt watch it either) _

"Oh damn, looks like some NC16 shit," Shawn says, watching the trailer. "Hell, you're 20 and I'm 22, we won't get spooked," I say casually, trying to hide a smile. "Ha, by the end of an episode you'd probably be clutching on to my arm for dear life," he jokes. "We'll see," I laugh. God knows I have an extremely high tolerance level. He'll be the one clutching me for dear life. I smirk as I click the play button. The first few minutes pass by with nothing really scary. "So, how you doing?" I ask Shawn, who's fidgeting nervously. He gives me a thumbs up, though that's clearly not the case. I laugh. "Good." And then another few boring minutes in which I gulp down half a can of beer, in case of a jump-scare and I spill my beer. "Hmm, no scary scenes so far," Shawn says, sipping his beer like it was wine. A few minutes pass and Shawn grips my hand as the music becomes scarier. "OH FUCK!" we both suddenly shout as a ghost called the bent neck lady appears. I scoot towards Shawn who almost spilled his beer. His face is white. Like a ghost. _(LMAO YES)_ "That was-" Shawn says, clearly in trauma. "Fucking scary," I say, traumatised too. Shawn nods. My hand finds Shawn's and I grip it. He grips mine back. "Better drink your beer before another jump-scare," I say, letting out a nervous chuckle and gulping down the rest of the beer. "Or maybe we should watch something else," Shawn says, wanting to back out. I give him a look. "Really, Shawn, really? Don't back out now," I say, trailing my fingers down his arm. He shivers. "God damn it, Mary, stop. Let's watch a rom-com or something," he says, pausing the episode. I sigh. "Fine, what do you want to watch?" I say as I exit the page and pass Shawn the remote.

"To All The Boys I Loved Before?" he says, clicking it. I give him a look of surprise. "Um, what? Are you serious? That show's for teenagers, Shawn! AKA major cringe alert!" "You haven't watched it, have you?" he asks me, smiling. I sigh and shake my head. "See? You might like it," he says. "Well, okay," I finally give in and press play. "You know, this is awkward, let's talk about some stuff," he says, sensing the awkward silence after a few minutes. "I don't really know you well and yet I'm already staying at your place." "Well, not exactly, and besides, I don't really mind you staying," I say. "You're nice," I pause and add. Yeah, he really was quite a nice guy. "I feel so indebted to you, like you literally saved me from all that shit with Jake, I really have no idea how to thank you enough." "Why don't you just tell me more about yourself?" he encourages me. Well, okay then. I've never really talked about myself to other people, because they always talk about _themselves._ "Let's start with the most difficult things then," I say, forcing myself to talk about Jake, despite part of my brain violently objecting. _You hardly know this guy and you're already opening yourself up to him? What are you thinking, Mary?_ Well, I need to get stuff off my mind. Besides, Shawn is nice. _Don't be so quick to judge, Mary. Don't trust him too soon. He might turn out to be like Jake, and you'd get yourself heartbroken again._ I know my limits, God damn it.

"Hmm?" Shawn's soulful eyes stare into my soulless ones. Okay, not really, I'm just exaggerating. "Right. Yeah. So guess how Jake actually convinced me to be his girlfriend?" I say, almost laughing at the incredulity of the situation. It's was ridiculous, really, how naive I was that time. "What, sweet-talk you into his bed?" Shawn says. "No. He was rather... obvious. I should have seen through him, but I was too stupid and insecure," I say, sighing resignedly. Shawn doesn't press, but just drinks his beer, patiently waiting for me to say what I wanted to. "He honked and whistled at me every single day when I was walking to school," I say, fidgeting with my fingers.

"When he first did it, I was... happy. My insecure and stupid self thought that it was a compliment. You see, I wasn't exactly popular in school, as you could have guessed. I thought that I was, well, ugly, plainly speaking. It's mostly 'cause of teenage hormones. Happy teenagers are practically unheard of in the twenty-first century," I snort. Shawn nods, looking sad.

"Anyway, at school I thought that everyone was talking bad about me. I didn't exactly fit in. I was weird, I was bitchy to anyone that tried to come close to me because I was convinced that nobody liked me and that those who wanted to come close to me had ulterior motives. So, when Jake first honked at me, I felt like flipping him off, but then I looked through his windshield and saw that he had a, quote-unquote genuine smile, and I smiled back but of course I didn't get in. However, I was already convinced that he genuinely liked me. After a few times, I finally got into his car. The first thing he said was, 'Hey, beautiful.' and if I was smart or at least not so naive as I was at that time, I would've thought him predatory. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case and I fell for him. We spent more time together in school and every time we made out, it was heated and I thought he felt the same towards me as I did towards him. Over time, we started having sex every now and then. Believe it or not, I was the one who hinted that we should have sex. I believed that sex equals love and that it is essential for love. And so we fucked. And the rest is history."

Shawn nods. "You're strong. You're still alive. And now it's time to live a better life without him." "It is a miracle that I have survived. Though most of the time I feel like dying," I whisper, barely loud enough for him to hear. I unclasp the watch on my left wrist to reveal a scar. "Suicide attempt number 3, I slit my wrist. This one's recent. My friend found me and sent me to the hospital, where miraculously, I survived. Arick didn't want to leave my presence for months after the incident." Shawn bites his lip. "Suicide attempt number 2. A year ago, just months after I cut Jake off. I tried to overdose on sleeping pills, however it didn't work. Suicide attempt number 1. Before I was with Jake. I tried to hang myself, but my mum found me before I could do so," I say, putting on my watch.

"You've been through so much. I really don't know what to say..." Shawn's voice trails off as he pulls me into a hug.

"You don't have to say anything. Just be with me. And don't turn out to be like Jake," I say, my petite body trembling in Shawn's embrace.

"I promise."

A/N: oml im so happy that i managed to get something out for you guys before school starts. im starting secondary school next year and i wont be active anymore. this might be the last update in a long time >_< good bye lovelies <3

 


	11. arick.

Arick's POV

"Welcome home, Arick," the immigration officer says politely as he returns my passport. I smile widely and nod at him as I head out of the airport and into the underground subway station. I sigh as I turn on my phone once again and check if Mary has seen my messages. Nope. She hasn't called back either. She's either drunk or with the asshole. I'm hoping it's the earlier.

_Arick's phone_

_to: Mary_

Hellooooo

I touched down in Toronto

Japan was awesome, as usual

Hello?

Are you drunk again...

Remember DONT spray any of your fragrances or whatever because it'll smell even more

Hey?

AH SHIT ARE YOU WITH THE ASS

Please reply me

Hey...??

I'm coming straight to your apartment if you don't reply me

SCREW IT I AM COMING FOR YOUR ASS

_Mary's phone_

10 missed calls from arick.

12 unread messages from arick.

Arick's POV

After an hour of the subway, I finally alight at the station. "Mary, I will personally beat you up if you are purposely ignoring my messages and calls," I mutter to myself as I exit the station. The cool air of Toronto greeted me as I climbed up the stairs. Vastly different from Tokyo and Osaka. It feels good to be home but I preferred Tokyo, especially the district of Akihabara, its bustling streets lined with "otaku" shops and gaming arcades.

I walked as brisk as I could to Mary's apartment, whilst fishing for the house key in my bag.

_1 billion years later (SpongeBob voice)_

I finally find the house key as I walk up to the door and thump on the door. "Mary? Mary? Hey! Answer me!" I shout. "I'm going in now!" I unlock the door with the key. The moment I open the door, a strong odour greeted me. Overnight beer and wine, with a tinge of cologne. Wait. Cologne?

I look at the couch. It was just Mary. She was in her usual home clothes, an oversized sweater and flannel pants. I close the door behind me, leaving my luggage at the door, and walk over to Mary. I tap her shoulder. "Hey, Mary? Mary, it's me, Arick." She opens her eyes gradually. "Arick? Oh, hi," she says, rubbing her temple. "So, how were Tokyo and Osaka?" Attempting to change the subject. Very well. I sigh. "Mary, I know you don't drink unless something happens. What happened?" I say while clearing the table full of beer cans. "Oh, it's nothing," she says with a wave of her hand as she takes some beer cans into the trash, trying to look busy. "Goodness, Mary. Why do I smell cologne? Did you bring someone home?" I say in an old granny's voice. I could feel her smile though she was standing back facing me. She purposely ignores me.

"Hey, tell me," I walk over to her and put my hand on her shoulder. She looks at me in the eye, and despite me being used to that, I shiver a little. To my surprise, she hugs me, sniffling. Oh no. Jake must have come over again. "Hey. Hey. Do you want some tea? Matcha is good for calming your nerves," I say, desperate. Someone give me a crash course on how to handle crying girls, anyone?

She releases me and smiles, the tears a huge contrast with her smile. "Thank you," she says softly as she walks back to the couch and closes her eyes, rubbing her temples. I take out the bags of Matcha tea leaves I got from Osaka and begin to brew tea.

"So, what happened?" I ask as I put the two cups down on the coffee table. She sniffles as she sips the tea. "Careful, it's hot," I say. She nods and sips some more. We finish the tea in an hour as she pours out the happenings of the past few days. So Jake did come. And she did bring someone else home. Screw it. "Let's do a video for our fans," I say attempting to lighten the mood. "It'll be a travel vlog, and of course we'll do some animations."

I see Mary's eyes shine with passion.

"Let's do it. I'll get ready."

A/N: OmO that was way too short but I desperately needed to publish something so there you go. It was definitely boring but well, NEW CHARACTER! the next chapter will be simultaneous with this chapter, which means that it will happen while this chapter is happening. it will be from shawn's pov so look forward to that!! which also means aaliyah, manny and karen will be making their first appearance! thank you for reading this crap until here. but until next time, so long lovelies <3

 


	12. shawn.

A/N this is basically what happened from the night before (when Shawn left Mary's place all the way to when Arick came back from Japan)

Shawn's POV

"Hey, you should start going," Mary says as she stares at me. She must have seen me dozing off a couple of times during our "To All the Boys I Have Loved Before" marathon. "Nah, it's okay," I say, rubbing my eyes. "You're feeling okay now?" I ask. "Sure, why not?" Mary laughs as she sees the smile creeping up my face. "Then, I guess I'll get going?" I say, phrasing my statement into a question. "Yeah, yeah you can go. I need my beauty sleep," Mary pushes me towards the door. I actually let myself be pushed around by Mary. Wow. "Okay, okay, I'll get going. You sure you'll be alright by yourself?" I say again. "Yes, yes, I'm fine. Now go..." I laugh as Mary says that and exit the apartment. "Bye, and thanks again," Mary smiles at me and closes the door shut. I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. Goodness, Mendes, you have gotten yourself into deep trouble over a girl. Now that jerk can find me anytime and God knows what he'll do. I stumble home, kind of drunk. I reach my apartment within 30 minutes and unlock the door. The smell of wood greets me, as I lock the door and collapse on the sofa.

-the next morning-

I wake up in a state of grogginess to a girl's voice. "Shawn, wake up!" the voice shouts. I open my eyes slowly and find my sister's face staring down at mine. "Goodness, Aaliyah. Can't you tell that I'm extremely hungover and I do not appreciate you shouting at me this early morning? And also what are you even doing here," I scowl. She gives me a pleased smile. "That's the effect I was going for. Also, how is it early morning? It's 10.30, and Mum and Dad are already up. Mum and Dad told me to come to your place to check on you. You've been kinda weird lately. How're things going with you finding someone else?" she asks, obviously inquiring about my quest to find a rebound. Things weren't going that well, until I found Mary, of course. I have no plan to tell my family though, not yet. We'll see how things are going first. So I give Aaliyah a weird smile and head for the bathroom to wash up. Half an hour later, I step out of the bathroom, feeling kinda refreshed, but still having a headache. That sister of mine is on the sofa, scrolling through her phone. She senses me stepping out of the bathroom and calls out to me. "Shawn, let's meet Mum and Dad for breakfast. The cafe that we always go to," she says. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. They'll grill me about my endeavours in finding a girl. Definitely. "Uh, sorry Aaliyah, I have something on. I have to go," I barely escape as I get my phone, sidestep her and step out of the house, running down to the ground floor and hailing a cab to Mary's house. Maybe I could chat with her for a while before getting my car and going... wherever. As long as I escape Aaliyah. I'm free for the whole day anyway. I get into a cab shortly, waving at Aaliyah as the car drives away. I tell the driver the rough location of Mary's place. I sigh and turn on my phone. 6 missed calls from Camila. Wait, what? We already broke off. Officially. One year ago. One year. Why is she even calling? I check the timestamp of the calls. All late night calls. I purse my lips as I think of the reason she could be calling me. One, she's drunk. Two, she's bored. Three, the least possible of all reasons, she misses me and wants us back. I bite my lips as I think of those nights we spent laying on the grass stargazing.

-flashback-

"You know what that one's called?" Camila says, pointing at some bright dots clustered together, a sharp contrast against the dark blue canvas. They seemed to form...uh, nothing interesting. "I don't know, Aquarius?" I guessed. "No, it's called Boötes, the herdsman," Cami replies, smiling at my ignorance. "I wonder what those prehistoric people were thinking, naming constellations after people when they don't even look like people," I blurt out. "Well, I have no idea either, but I guess there's some symbolism to the names," she says dreamily, running her hands through my hair. "By the way, have you remembered  the names of the moons I taught you about?" she asks, turning towards me. I smile at her in the dim light provided only by those celestial creations. "Well, yes, the four largest moons of Jupiter are Io, Europa, Ganymede and Callisto. Mars' two moons are Phobos and... Deimos? I think?" I reply. The moons were quite interesting, actually. She beams at me, her face brighter than the sun that could be seen in the other end of the planet now. "That's correct," she says, cupping my face in her hand. "Why though? Why did you ask me to memorise those moons?" I ask, purely curious. "Well, those were my favourite moons," she says and fishes out some stuff from her pocket. She holds them in the moonlight. They were two bracelets. Both had three stones set in it. The first one had the words Io, Europa and Deimos. The second one had the words Ganymede, Callisto and Phobos. They looked absolutely beautiful. She helps me wear the one with  Io, Europa and Deimos on my wrist. She wears her bracelet on her wrist too. "Did you make them yourself?" I ask. "Yeah," she says, admiring her work as she brings both our wrists together. "Wow," I can't help but exclaim. "It's breathtaking." She laughs, her cheeks tinging pink. "You're breathtaking," she whispers, and leans in. Her lips touch mine, and it's the most wonderful feeling I have ever felt. Her warm hands touch my cheeks and my hair. My cold hands wrap around her waist, slowly rubbing her back. She's my sun, and I'm her moon. The moon loves the sun, and the sun loves the moon.

_A/N: nothing to say but uwu owo uwu owo who do you ship more with shawn now? camila or mary?_

 

 


	13. someone, somewhere

_don't worry not a lot of drama will be in this chapter_

Shawn Mendes

A while more, and I reach Mary's place, still thinking about Camila. I mean, I know it's wrong, after all, I've broken up with her. But some part of me still wants her back. That crazy little girl who loved moons. We were as serious as a high school couple could be, I guess. It was just the wrong timing.

I pay the taxi driver and I get out of the cab, walking into the apartment building and taking the lift up to Mary's unit. I get out as the lift door opens at the 19th floor. I walk over to her unit and knock on the door. "It's Shawn," I shout through the door. After a while, the door opens, revealing Mary in an oversized sweater and gym shorts, her hair tied up in a bun. She looks different. I look over her shoulder and see a guy sitting on the sofa, working on something on his laptop. I raise my eyebrows. Mary chuckles. "Hey, Arick, this is the guy I brought home last night," she says, and the guy drops whatever he's doing and comes to the door. "Hey, I'm Mary's friend. Arick," he smiles and holds out his hand. Seems like a gentleman. "Shawn. Mary's..." I trail off as I shake his hand. "Got it," he laughs and puts his hand back in his pocket. "You're here to collect your car, right?" Mary gets back to the topic on hand. "Yeah, um... I'll get going," I notice the awkwardness and start to leave. I have something on, anyway. I have decided to call Camila back. I can't just leave her hanging like that. Mary senses something. "Shawn, something's wrong, right?" she says, touching my arm. "Hmm?" I act innocently. Perhaps a little too innocent. She crosses her arms. "Okay then. Bye," she gives me a hug and lets me leave. I nod at Arick and head for the lift, going to the basement carpark. 

I unlock the car and open the car door as I slide into the driver's seat, closing the door. I call Camila as I drive off. After a few dial tones, she picks up. "Hey," she says. "Mm," I reply. "I just miss you, I guess," her voice soothing to the ear. I don't know how to reply. I just keep quiet. "I just wanted to hear your voice. L.A. hasn't exactly been good to me," she elaborates. Oh, right, she moved to L.A. right after graduation. She mentioned that she wanted to pursue a career in the arts. We tried to keep up the relationship a while after she moved, but long-distance wasn't working out for us and we just decided to end things. It wasn't a melodramatic breakup or anything, we just thought that closure would be better for all of us. She maintained her stand that she still loved me, she always will, she just wanted to focus on her future. I agreed to her request, since my feelings for her wasn't as strong as before. It was a peaceful ending, but not a happy one. I heard from her friends that after that she cried almost every time she mentions me. I asked them how she was doing, but they declined to tell me anything else. I sigh. "Do you still love me?" I ask, and regret it immediately. There was a slight pause on the other end of the phone. "I guess," she says vaguely. "To the moon and back?" I ask. It was an inside joke between us. We would always say that when we were stargazing. I expect to hear her chuckle from the other end, but she stayed quiet. "Just wondering, since your networking is so good, is there anyone in the arts industry you know, that you can introduce to me?" she says, speaking like a businesswoman. I tap my fingers on the steering wheel. Her tone of voice has completely changed. "No," I give her a short answer, without thinking about it. "Oh. Thank you," her voice sounding so distant and formal. "I have to go. Bye," I say and hang up before she could say anything else. 

Why couldn't we just get over ourselves? We would have been happy.

I exit the first exit on the highway that I see. I turn around a curve mindlessly, just wanting to see where it will bring me. I've never been this free-spirited since Camila left. We used to go on these road trips to random places, and they were the best decisions I have ever made in my life up till now. I stop at a red traffic light and scan the surroundings. There was a few office buildings, and a Tim Hortons. As soon as the traffic light goes green, I drive to the nearest carpark I see and park my car there. I guess I'll swing by Tim Hortons to grab a bite.

-20 minutes later-

I finish up my sandwich and head on outside to walk around, coffee in hand. There was a small pier and I walk over to it. It was pretty quiet since it was the Easter holiday. Just great, 7 days of not doing anything. I look out at the sea and remember that first kiss that I had with Camila, at the beach.

-flashback-

"You know, Shawn," Camila says and holds my hand in hers. "Yeah?" I reply and look at her as she stops walking. "I think I might have fallen for you," she says quietly. I stare into her eyes. Yes. "I might have, too," I say and tug a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. She takes a step towards me, and another. It was time. I close my eyes and she tiptoes to kiss me on the lips. I grab her by the waist and she puts her hand on my cheek. The only two words that I can think of is, an epiphany. I desire for more of her.

-present-

I blink rapidly as I look out at the sea. Tears were threatening to leave my eyelids. Why am I missing her so much? Now, she's nothing more than a memory. I shouldn't even be thinking about her. I should be focusing on the present, and shoving her at the back of my mind.

I guess I just can't bring myself to.

I tilt my head as I hear a couple walking towards the railing. They were laughing merrily with the guy's arm around the girl's waist. I press my lips together tightly. Camila and I used to be that way. We were even talking about starting a family together, and I pressed my head against her tummy, pretending to listen for the baby. 

All that is gone now.

I can't stop myself and the tears I have been trying to hold back escapes out of my eyelids and falls onto my cheeks. I grip the railing as hard as I can. I feel like I'm falling. 

Camila's face appears in my mind and I grab on to that image. Even if I can't have her, at least she's still in my mind. 

I can't help but think that she's with someone else now, somewhere, totally forgetting about me.

Someone, somewhere.

 

 


End file.
